28 North Union Street
Lambertville, NJ, 08530
609.865.8896
The People's Store • Lambertville, New Jersey
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A miracle box (see below) was placed in my studio collecting people's thoughts for an entire year. I pondered the subject in my dreams or lying awake in the early morning hours. The concept revolves around viewing seeds as prayers.
Life begins in darkness -
buried seeds
fetus in the womb.
Encouraged conditions -
are warm.
are cherished.
are nurtured.
Pregnancy -
An inhale
of immense hopes.
of epic dreams.
of great anticipation.
Birth -
A huge exhale
Monumental
life explodes
first breath
begin again.
Creatures hatch,
seeds blow in the wind,
and
mammals are birthed seeking...
Life becomes rooted
growth.
growth out of darkness
towards the light.
Seeds wake up
Seeds are life
Seeds are prayers
Planted with
great intentions,
dreams,
wishes,
wonder,
innocence,
expectations,
trust,
faith,
belief,
hope,
miracles.
All seeds have parents.
Does the river have a mother, a father?
Does the sun have a mother, a father?
Do prayers have a mother, a father?
Do we carry seeds
from
the ancestors?
Do we fulfill
their
longings?
Can we heal
the past?
Are seeds
for this present life?
Are seeds
for future? When we
return to evolve
again -
this time
this time
for the seeds
for my children
for their children
for the planet
for all
existence.
oil on canvas, 96 x 30
oil on canvas, 96 x 30
oil on canvas, 96 x 30
oil on canvas, 96 x 30
oil on canvas, 45” x 59”
oil on canvas, 58” x 43”
oil on canvas, 58” x 35”
oil on canvas, 58” x 39”
oil on canvas, 58” x 28”
oil on canvas, 24x48
oil on canvas, 12x16, commission
oil on canvas, 59” x 38”
oil on canvas, 36” x 58”
oil on canvas, 41 x 56, sold
oil on canvas, 46” x 55” sold
oil on canvas, 98” x 64”
oil on canvas, 62 x 33, sold
oil on canvas , 93” x 63”, sold
22x30, oil on paper
Oil on paper, 22 x 30
oil on canvas, 39” x 48”, sold
Throughout history, the rose has many meanings from true love, to the divine feminine, to peace and sacred blessings to political symbolism and bloodshed. In this collection of paintings, to me the rose feels symbolic of humans’ brilliance and beauty as well as our destruction and demise. The rose displays breathtaking loveliness and purity, yet it also displays seduction and impermanence. The petals, in all their velvet luxury, lure us in yet the thorns protect its own self, discouraging engagement. In this collection of paintings: Tales from a Rose Garden, humans have become extinct and the animals remain. The Great Mother thrives and we are a distant memory. The rose portrays the link between what was once human and the animal’s perception of our behavior.
Spring 2023
oil on canvas, 40 x 30
oil on canvas, 40 x 30, sold
oil on canvas, 40 x 30, sold
oil on board, 48 x 48, sold
oil on canvas, 40 x 30, sold
oil on canvas, 40 x 30, sold
oil on canvas, 40 x 30, sold
oil on canvas, 58 x 40
oil on canvas, 58 x 43
oil on canvas, 48 x 24, sold
oil on canvas, 40 x 30
oil on canvas, 40 x 30
oil on canvas, 40 x 58
oil on canvas, 37 x 28, sold
oil on canvas, 37 x 28, sold
oil on canvas, 58” x 36”, sold
28” x 39”
oil on canvas, 27” x 39”
oil on canvas 27” x 39”
oil on canvas, 27” x 36”, sold
oil on canvas, 27 x 35, sold
oil on canvas, 48” x 24”
oil on canvas, 48 x 24
oil on canvas, 48” x 24”, sold
oil on canvas, 40 x 28
I think of animals as being right brain dominant, while we humans are the opposite. We are masters in computing tasks requiring less intuition and more logical, sequential, linear thinking. Long ago I imagine we thought more with our right brain - we were able to intuit how to navigate living in the natural world - embodying a connection with something much bigger. We were guided by an invisible energy, a universal grace, which wasn’t a belief or a religion, but a wild knowing which is what I observe in animals. This energy was felt in our hearts more than our brains and we operated on the natural-born synchronicities surrounding us. This particular collection of paintings is focused on the feelings I have about animals’ wisdom. Their ability to sense incoming change way before a human may sense anything. They are our portal.
oil on canvas, 36 x 26
oil on canvas, 36” x 26”, sold
oil on canvas, 36” x 27”, sold
oil on canvas, 50” x 37”
oil on canvas, 36 x 27, sold
oil on canvas, 24” x 48”
oil on canvas, 20” x 16” sold
oil on canvas, 20” x 16”, sold
oil on canvas, 20” x 16”, sold
oil on board, 48” x 48”, sold
oil on canvas, 43” x 30”
oil on canvas, 59 x 45
oil on canvas, 57” x 27”
Factory farmed animals endure a miserable, tortured life, maybe the worst on the planet. Overcrowding, force-feeding, zero grazing, solely indoors, body mutilations, machine attachments, separation from birth, terrifying slaughter.
I do eat meat and hang my head low as I partake in this way of living. I struggle with my hypocrisy and feel certain that consuming the dispirited animal somehow enters my soul and I am forever scarred. I do feel healthier however, with a complex diet and have had to grapple w meat-eating issues. I realize however, as I watch the bird eat her worm, that it’s the abuse and recklessness we humans are so capable of that bothers me the most. To capitalize blindly turning away from the unbearable truth of it all. For now, I'll continue w my diet but try hard to buy from sources where the animal has lived a normal humane life. It's expensive, yet I’d like to think of meat as a special treat not staple. This painting speaks of so much more environmental impacts but that’s enough explaining for now.
oil on door, 78” x 36”
oil on door panel, 30 x 80
oil on door, 36 x 80
oil on canvas, 58 x 43
oil on canvas, 48 x 36
48x48, oil on board, sold
oil on canvas, 48 x 36, sold
48 x 60, oil on canvas, sold
oil on canvas, 36x36, sold
oil on canvas, 12 x 12
oil on board, 48” x 24”
oil on canvas, 36 x 36, sold
6 x 36, oil on canvas
6 x 36, oil on canvas, sold
6 x 36, oil on canvas, sold
oil on canvas, 24" x 36" sold
60 x 48, oil on canvas
oil on canvas, 48" x 24" sold
oil on 4 canvas, 36"x12" each
oil on canvas, 60 x 48, sold
30 x 40, oil on paper, sold
oil on masonite, 48" x 24", sold
oil on masonite, 48" x 24"
oil on masonite, 48" x 24"
oil on masonite, 48" x 24", sold
oil on canvas, 36" x 24", donated
oil on board, 36" x 48", sold
oil on paper, 30" x 24"
oil on paper, 48" x 36", sold
oil on canvas, 36x48
oil on board, 48" x 36"
36" x 24", oil canvas
oil on canvas, 36" x 24", sold
oil on canvas, 48" x 36"
oil on canvas, 24" x 36", sold
oil on canvas, 12x12
12" x 8", oil on canvas
oil on paper, 20 x 30, detail - Love Landscapes, sold
oil on canvas, 20 x 24, donated
oil on canvas, 30x40
oil on canvas, 24 x 48
oil on canvas, 60" x 60"
oil on canvas, 36 x 48, sold
oil on canvas, 30 x 40
“Birth Memory Cycle” was conceived when I was particularly troubled in my life. A dear healer suggested I rest inside the womb of a golden egg. The imagery of this was calming, warm, safe, yet full of a certain tremor, an edge, pregnant with possibilities.
The egg; its perfect shape, narrow at one end gracefully widening to its base, holds compatible polarities. It holds the female energy of fertility and the male energy of procreation, becoming a symbolic container of all that is. –– rebirth, ever-shifting, new possibilities. The opaque yolk cradled by the clear glutinous sac surrounding it, is the fetus luxuriating in its amniotic fluid; a planet gently suspended by the universe or the human soul, walking this earth, surrounded by the ever-present divine atmosphere, all waiting for the inevitable shift.
“Birth Memory Cycle” are paintings based on memories from long ago –– to visually untangle the message being conveyed to me.
oil on doors, 36" x 80" each
2nd place winner, Art of Darkness, oil on door, 30" x 80", sold
oil on door, 30" x 80"
oil on door panal, 28" x 80"
oil on panel, 30" x 80", sold
oil on door, 30" x 78"
oil on door, 36 x 80, sold
oil on canvas, framed, 38x50
oil and maps on board, 24x48
oil and maps on board, 48x 48, sold
oil on canvas, 20 x 20, sold
oil on canvas, 16 x 12
oil on canvas, 36 x 24, sold
oil on canvas, 16x20, sold
oil pastel, watercolor on paper, 8.5 x 11.5
watercolor, oil pastel, on paper, 12x17
oil on canvas, 18x18, sold
oil on board, 18x18, sold
oil on canvas, 12 x 12, sold
oil on canvas, 8x8, sold
oil on canvas, 11x14, sold
oil on canvas, 11x14, sold
oil on canvas, 11x14, sold
oil on canvas, 11x14, sold
oil on canvas, 6x6, sold
oil on canvas, 8x8, sold
oil on canvas, 12x12, sold
oil on canvas, 12x12, sold
oil on canvas, 12x12, sold
oil on canvas, 12x12, sold
oil on canvas, 12x12, sold
oil on canvas, 11x14, sold
oil on canvas, 8x10, sold
oil on canvas, 8x10, sold
oil on canvas, 8x10, sold
oil on canvas, 8x10, sold
oil on canvas, 8x10, sold
oil on canvas, 11x14, sold
oil on canvas, 8x10, sold
oil on canvas, 11x14, sold
oil on canvas, 8x10, sold
On view at The Watershed, Pennington, NJ until June 14, 2019
“If someone offers you ten thousand dollars or ten trees, take the trees.”
Alex Hutchinson, writer “How Trees Calm Us Down” The New Yorker, 2015
I think it’s true that every person we meet and every experience we have mirrors a part of us. Is this true for all living organisms?
I think about Trees and wonder what our reflections are telling each other. I know when I walk in the forest, my anxiety and stress lowers. My breathing becomes fuller and my thoughts shift to a higher ground… it feels like nature is taking me into her limbs and administering the exact medicine I need for that day. What am I doing for the Trees?
And if we are placed on this Earth to recognize, express and share our unique gift, I imagine this must be true for all creatures. I think about Trees and the myriad of ways we have utilized their gifts on this planet. From paper, shelter and food to everyday objects. In their most natural state, they also create peace and beauty –– an urban street with Trees planted on either side has less crime and happier residents than a barren concrete block.
So it appears to me that their purpose is to protect and provide - and they do so with unwavering commitment and strength. Their most astonishing attribute, among all the others, is their ability to clean the air allowing us to breath! It's no wonder I feel better when I’m around them.
I am moved and humbled, and feel a certain discomfort, in how to possibly express my gratitude and reverence for these stoic creatures.
Back in my studio, I contemplate the great paintings in history depicting worship of Christ, Saints and the Blessed Virgin Mary. Trees are sacred in many parts of the world and are used as offerings of healing and prayer. I feel Trees should be worshipped in this way. Placing them on a high pedestal with angels and cherubs flying about celebrating their glorious lives! They’ve been with humans from the beginning and have even survived mass extinction way before the dinosaurs. I think about their ability to survive and inevitably compare it to our own species. Humans oscillate between hope and despair in life - this seems confusing in the survival game and a meandering path that may lose direction. Trees seem to persevere no matter the condition.
There are thousands of Trees to be painted. In this small collection of works, I have chosen to paint a few of my favorites.
If inclined, I would love to hear about your experience with Trees.
In gratitude,
Johanna
“For every breath you take, thank a tree.”
Diana Beresford-Kroeger, scientist and acclaimed author
Trees provide food, create medicine, and most importantly, provide life-giving oxygen. Without trees and their ability to capture carbon dioxide, our living breathable atmosphere would cease to exist on our planet. Trees are the most important living organisms on earth, chemically affecting our environment more than anything else, and playing a vital role that sustains all life. Trees are literally the lifeline of the planet and the key to reversing climate change./ www.calloftheforest.ca “Call of the Forest - The Forgotten Wisdom of Trees”
Family: Oleaceae
Height: 85 to 100 ft high Diameter: 4 to 6 ft./ Life Span: Up to 250 years. growing./ Leaves: Leaflets are often ovate (egg-shaped). The leaves are whitish beneath. This tree contains opposite pinnately compounded leaves./ Fruit: Have long, narrow winged fruits or “keys” Dioecious./ Bark: Thick, dark gray, diamond-shaped furrows and interlacing ridges./ Roots: Broad root system./ Wood: Strong, straight-grained, light-weight, elastic, resilient, durable./ Aesthetic: Exquisite autumn colors - yellow, deep purple and maroon. Round-topped crown and spreading canopy. Dependents: White-tailed deer, cattle browse white ash. Beaver, porcupine, rabbits eat the bark. Leaves and seeds are eaten by butterfly, moth, caterpillars, wood duck, northern bob white, turkey, grouse, finches, grosbeaks, cardinals, fox, squirrel, mice. Cavity nesters - redheaded, red-bellied, and pileated woodpeckers./ Uses: The durable wood is used to make tool handles, oars, canoe paddles, hockey sticks, furniture, antique vehicle parts, snowshoes, cabinets, railroad cars and ties. White ash is the wood used for Louisville Slugger baseball bats./ Medicinal Uses: Leaves: Juice from the leaves has been applied to bites for relief of swelling and itching. Laxative and general tonic for women after childbirth. Anti-inflammatory and antirhumatismal, arthritis, rheumatism, gout./ Seed: aphrodisiac, a diuretic, appetite stimulant, a styptic, an emetic, fevers./ Bark: tea for an itching scalp, lice, snakebite, sores. Edible Uses: Leaves & Fruits: Medicinal wine, herbal teas, chewing gum, marinades for meats and vegetables.
The Ash Tree and the Emerald Ash Borer Emerald ash borer (EAB) attacks all species of ash native to the United State. / Both healthy and unhealthy trees can be attacked. / An Asian insect first identified in Detroit, Mich., in 2002, has become the most destructive forest insect to ever invade the U.S. / Tens of millions of ash trees have already been killed in forests and swamps, along waterways and in urban, suburban and rural neighborhoods. / Females lay a few eggs, tucking them beneath bark flaps or in bark crevices. / Larvae hatch from their eggs and chew through the rough outer bark to reach a layer of inner bark, called phloem. Here, the trees transport carbohydrates and other nutrients from the canopy down to the roots. / The larvae feed in s-shaped tunnels, called galleries, for several weeks. As the larvae grow, the galleries increase in size. Galleries often etch the outer ring of sapwood, which ash trees use to transport water up from the roots to the canopy. / The ability of the tree to transport nutrients and water is disrupted by the galleries. The canopy begins to thin, and large branches may die. Eventually, the entire tree succumbs.
Family: Plane tree
Height: 75 to 120 ft high Diameter: 4 to 10 ft/ Life Span: Up to 500 years. Fast-growing. Tolerates difficult environments./ Leaves: Broad, massive, maple-like leaves/ Fruit: Small, brown, burr-like ball which is a cluster of many small seed-like fruits called achenes with fuzzy hair-like structures attached. Monoecious./ Bark: Mottled bark which flakes leaving mottled gray, greenish-white and brown surface./ Roots: Fibrous and shallow./ Wood: Light brown, tinged with red; heavy, hard, difficult to split./ Aesthetic: Tall, grand-canopied tree, widely planted as a shade tree./ Dependents: Seeds eaten by many birds including purple finch, goldfinch, chickadees, and dark- eyed junco, muskrats, beavers, and squirrels. Hollow sycamores provide dens for black bear. Cavity nesting birds inhabit the sycamore including the barred owl, eastern screech-owl, great crested fly catcher, chimney swift, and the wood duck./ Uses: Grown commercially for pulp and rough lumber. Turns easily on a lathe for bowls and spoons. Music boxes, instruments, butcher blocks, wooden buttons./ Medicinal Uses: Bark: Tea used for colds, coughs, and lung ailments, measles, laxative. Tincture for eyelid tumors. Astringent properties to treat skin issues and eye wash./ Sap: Wound dressing/ Edible Uses: Sap: As a drink, wine or syrup./ Leaves: Large leaves (up to 10 inches across) can be used as a wrap for slow cooked food over coals for an added sweet flavor./ Other uses: Windbreak for exposed and maritime areas. Leaves are packed around apples and root crops to help preserve them./ Sycamores can grow so large they have hollow trunks and many settlers sought long-term shelter inside a sycamore. It was not uncommon to house a pig or horse inside a living sycamore.
Family: Fagaceae (Beech Family)
Height: 65 - 130 feet Diameter:18 to 48 inches/ Lifespan: Can live up to 300 years./ Leaves: Broad, flat; simple; not lobed; course teeth; 2” to 5” long/ Fruit: Bur, commonly containing two nuts. Monoecious./ Roots: shallow and spreading/ Wood: Heavy, hard, tough and strong. Difficult to lumber without power tools, therefore many beech were left uncut before the 20th century./ Aesthetics: Beautiful smooth, blue-gray bark, leaves yellow-green in spring. Slow-growing, and favors shade./ Dependents: Ducks, wild turkeys, pheasants, blue jays, ruffed grouse, mice, squirrels, chipmunks, raccoons, fox, deer, rabbits, opossums, black bears, porcupines./ Uses: Boxes, crates, pallets, furniture, flooring, doors, paneling, handles, brooms. Suitable for food containers imparting neither taste nor odor. Excellent charcoal for artwork./ Medicinal Uses: Leaves: Boiled as a wash and poultice to treat frostbite, burns, poison ivy rash. Aids headaches and digestion./ Nuts: Medicinally used to destroy parasitic worms. Oils from the nuts stimulate hair growth, boost kidney function and help clear out toxins from the body./ Bark: As a tea for the treatment of lung ailments. Has been used to procure an abortion. The creosote made from beech wood is used to treat various human and animal disorders./ Edible Parts: Leaves: Raw or cooked when young, mildly flavored. Mature leaves tough and distasteful. Seed: Raw or cooked. Sweet and nutritious, rich in oil, containing up to 22% protein and high in Vitamin B6. The roasted seed is a coffee substitute./ Bark: Dried, ground into a powder as a thickening in soups and stews. Rich in lignans and antioxidant boosting your immune system./ Other uses: Seed: Oil as fuel for lamps/ Leaves and bark: Dyes/ The American beech needs plenty of moisture and rich soil to thrive and naturally occurs in bottomland forests. Early settlers often looked for beeches as a sign of a good potential place to clear the forest for farming.
Family: Ginkgophyta (The only living species in the division, all others extinct)
Height: 66 to 160 feet Diameter: 25 - 35 inches./ Life Span: Up to 3000 years/ Leaves: Unique among seed plants, fan-shaped with veins radiating out into the leaf./ Seed: Ginkgoes are dioecious, some trees being female and others male. Male plants produce small pollen cones. Female plants produce two ovules formed at the end of the stalk, and after pollination, one or both develop into seeds./ Roots: Deep-rooted and resistant to wind and snow damage./ Wood: Lightweight, brittle, yellow. Used for chess sets, chopping blocks and firewood./ Aesthetics: Prized for their deep saffron-yellow autumn foliage./ Dependents: Not favored by insects or birds. Only occasional squirrels occupancy is believed to be due to the offensive odor of the female seed./ Uses: Popular for the art of bonsai, Ginkgoes are kept artificially small, for centuries./ Medicinal Uses: Leaves: Extract derived from leaves are rich in antioxidants, phenolic compounds, flavinoids, terpenoids and other organic chemicals. It has been used medicinally for many health issues including: inflammation, heart health, brain function, dementia, anxiety, depression, vision health, blood pressure, nervous system, aging, pms, erectile dysfunction, asthma, hemorrhoids, altitude sickness, tinnitus, vertigo and many more./ Edible Parts:/ Fruit: Only on female tree. When the fruit is ripe, with a strong odor, it is split open and the white nut inside is steamed and eaten. Contains high levels of vitamin A, vitamin C, niacin, sodium, phosphorus, potassium./ The Ginkgo Biloba is found in fossils dating back 270 million years.
Family: Fagaceae (Beech Family)
Height: 70 to 120 feet Diameter: 2 to 4 feet./ Life Span: Can live up to 600 years, slow growth rate, longevity./ Leaves: Five to seven lobes and u-shaped sinuses, 3 to 6 inches long, glossy./ Fruit: Acorns produced at 30 - 40 years old. Often at 60 years produces a full crop, reoccurring every 2 - 3 years. Monoecious./ Roots: Bears a deep taproot therefore does not transplant well after 2 growing seasons./ Wood: Heavy, very strong, hard, durable./ Aesthetics: Especially popular in autumn displaying majestic copper red and orange./ Dependents: Squirrels, wood ducks, white-tail deer, wild turkey, birds, insects./ Uses: Oak barrels, railroad ties, shingles, clap-boards, furniture, fuel wood./ Medicinal Uses: Bark: An infusion of the inner bark has been used to treat intestinal pains. Galls produce a potent astringent and can be used in the treatment of dysentery, gum disease, varicose veins. Used for skin care, digestion, bone health, vitality./ Edible Parts: Acorns: Rich in thiamine, riboflavin, niacin, pantothenic acid), vitamin B6, folate, calcium, copper, magnesium, manganese, iron, potassium, and zinc. Candied acorns, acorn grits, acorn meal, acorn bread and cakes. Critical sustaining food to Native Americans often referred to as “Acorn Eating Tribes”. Dried, ground into a powder and used as a thickening agent similar to cornstarch. Mixed with flours for making bread. The roasted acorn is used as a coffee substitute./ Other uses: A mulch of the leaves repels slugs and grubs. Oak galls are a rich source of tannin creating a rich black ink./ Was revered by the Druids as a Tree of Life for healing the sick and providing vitality from its fruit.
Family: Juglandaceae (Walnut Family))
Height: 60 - 112 feet Diameter: 20 - 25 inches/ Life Span: Up to 350 years, slow-growing./ Leaves: Long, pinnate, with five leaflets./ Fruit Nuts: produced at 30 - 40 years old. Monoecious./ Roots: Bears a deep taproot./ Wood: Close-grained, heavy and very hard, extremely strong but flexible./ Aesthetics: Shaggy gray bark, leaves rich golden yellow in autumn./ Dependents: Ducks, bobwhites, wild turkey, mice, chipmunks, squirrels, rabbits, raccoons, black bears, fox./ Uses: Excellent quality wood, used for objects that require strength including bows, axe handles, ploughs, skis, drum sticks, tool handles, wheel spokes, sporting goods. Excellent for burning, giving off a lot of heat. A yellow dye is obtained from the inner bark. Popular for smoking meat and seafood. Burns very clean creating a long-lasting fire./ Medicinal
Uses: Leaves: Fresh small shoots steamed as an inhalant for treating headaches./ Bark: A extract of the bark has been taken internally to treat rheumatism and also used as a poultice on rheumatic joints./ Sap: Bug repellent when mixed with grease./ Edible Parts: Nuts: Nut milk and nut butter, baked goods. Significant food source for the Algonquins. Sap: sweet syrup
All of the paintings in this series are circular. I think of the circle as a healing element where we gather and go inward. The circle represents the cycles of circular time connecting our souls to our own prayer of love, with no beginning or end, yet in constant motion upward.
This collection was created for the Azul Trilogy. "Six Doorways for Awakening Love" by Amara Pagano, 2016
To bask peacefully in nature’s harmony I feel is where we truly reside in the deepest pools of our being. Nothing is separate, but innately linked to our inner beauty, in the ever changing cycles of seasons and lifetimes.
This painting depicts a woman resting in the womb of the Flower of Life. It is one of the oldest, sacred symbols known to man, and does not belong to a specific culture or religion, but can be found all over the world.
When flow through life is interrupted - my despair often turns to this symbol and its miracle in existing in the human body, plants, animals and even our galaxy. Because of this, I am reminded that I am on a journey far beyond my human comprehension and that I can rest in my dedication to the universal intelligence.
The butterflies represent transformation, metamorphosis and elevation from earthly matters.
To be of service is to be balanced within the masculine and the feminine. One relies on the other in a beautiful symmetry. It is the place of birth, nourishment and endurance.
This divine deity (avatar) appears in human form to transmute love to our planet and all living things.
Honesty can feel like an emotion at times, yet I find, in it’s pure form, is a crystal clear idea that directs intention. When the mind is quiet allowing us to enter into deeper truth - honesty reveals our most authentic self.
Through the various phases in our lives we identify with many “ways” of living in this world. We may change our name, career, spouse, sexual orientation, home, beliefs. We are ever-evolving creatures coming closer and closer to our core truth. I like to think of our ancestors as a continuous link in our purpose of discovering our place in the lineage.
Although the cycle of generations has landed in our laps, we may choose to break out of the traditional expectations imposed upon us, seeking a higher truth.
HER WINGS is among 20 works based on inspirations from my twelve-year-old daughter. When I went through a life-changing event, I became consumed with how the experience affected my kids –– this collection specifically focuses on my youngest child.
Underneath the kitchen table, peering into the waxy ear of my dog, was my favorite place to be at dinner time. Preferring to position myself by the feet of my family, opposed to attempting to converse with them, became my daily dinner post. During these meals, my parents had a secret language, that eventually my older sisters decoded and understood. A language that sounded loopy and repetitive as everything ended in “phi” and began with “alpha”. Maybe it was a frat language daddy picked up in college. It came and went as needed in testy dialogues above my head. I had no interest in comprehending it for I had my own language with the animals on our farm ––especially Fifi, my big, black, dog.
No one seemed to mind or even notice that I had slinked off my kitchen chair into my world where I was the white princess and Fifi was the black princess. Our kingdom was there, under the table, and during the day our kingdom was the vast expanse of land outside.
Under the massive cathedral of weeping willows, we would swing on the branches that hung low enough for my scrawny arms to reach. We spent hours in fascination of the swirling green moss, around our feet, in the riverbed or took lazy respites in the barn, hidden in the hayloft, where only mice and cats resided.
In a family of five children, I am the youngest. As a child, I loved feeling invisible. I was not bothered by family issues at hand. No one ever listened to me - I was too little - my opinion carried no weight and I was happy with that arrangement. I was quiet and in my dream state. My siblings were caught up in Jim Morrison, burning bras, sex, drugs and protesting war. I felt very lucky, Fifi and I had our kingdom. I relished in our secret world and being invisible.
Of course, time passed and we moved away from our beloved farm and all the animals. My secret world became ineffective and even awkward. Instead of an oasis, it became a hollowed-out sphere where I was lonely and unseen. Instead of Amish neighbors who sheared their sheep and made hand-made soaps, I experienced a different kind of neighbor –– they drank gin and tonics after their match on their backyard tennis court and swam naked in their swimming pool with ruckus laughter in the sexually-charged air.
Being invisible was no longer a portal to my magic kingdom, instead it became a strange feeling of not belonging. An unfamiliar pressure of wanting to fit in yet preferring to escape instead. I was no longer a princess, and the world became filled with a harshness. For the first time I looked at myself in the mirror and didn’t look with curiosity, instead I looked with judgement and self-criticism. I had lost my child. I had lost my spirit.
When does this moment of self-evaluation happen to a human being? My dear spiritual friend, Jan, says it happens to all of us around age 7, we grow away from God. Does it occur more easily, depending on circumstance? Maturity? Imagination? Does it have to happen? Is there anyone that has escaped it? Children do seem closer to their spirit. Is that why their art feels so fresh and uninhibited?
When my daughter was seven, she too, due to circumstance, grew up quickly. I watched as her spirit slipped away and she became responsible and self-reliant –– she is one of the strongest people I know. I do not deny that this was remarkable, yet of course, I often wonder who she would be had she held on to her spirit just a little longer.
Johanna Furst
November 2015
oil on canvas, triptych, 48x24 panels
oil on canvas, 48” x 24”
oil on canvas, 36 x 30
oil on canvas, 36x29
oil on canvas, 36 x 30
oil on canvas, 36 x 30
oil on canvas, sold
30 x 40
oil on canvas, 24 x 48
diptych, 60 x 36, oil on canvas, sold
oil, glitter, glue on canvas, 40" x 30"
oil, glitter, glue on canvas, 36" x 24", sold
oil. glitter, glue on canvas, 36" x 24"
oil, glitter, glue on canvas, 48" x 36"
oil, glitter, glue on canvas, 36" x 24"
oil on canvas, 24x48, sold
Oil on canvas, 32x42, sold
oil on canvas, 20x20
oil on canvas, 20x20
oil on canvas, 30 x 24
oil on canvas, 36x48
oil on canvas, 42 x 32
installation for Path to Azul, "Integrating Lower and Higher Self"oil on wood panels 96x72, sold
oil on board, detail 24x48
detail, oil on board 48x48
detail, oil on board, 24x48
oil on canvas, dyptych, sold
oil on canvas, 2@ 40 x 30/sold
oil on canvas, diptych, sold
oil on canvas, 44x31
oil on canvas, 36” x 26”, sold
oil on canvas 12 x 16
Love Landscapes(detail) oil on paper, 20 x 30/sold
oil on paper, 20 x 30/sold
oil on paper, 30 x 24
oil on paper, 30 x 24/sold
oil on canvas, polyptych, sold
oil on canvas, polyptych, sold
oil on canvas, polyptych, sold
oil on canvas, 14 x 14/sold
oil on canvas, 36 x 29
oil on canvas, 48x36
oil on board, 48 x 48
oil on paper, 48" x 36", sold
oil on canvas, 24 x 48
oil on canvas, 36" x 24"
oil on paper
oil on paper, 24x30
oil on paper, 24 x 30
oil on canvas, 36" x 24"
48" x 24", oil on canvas
oil on paper, 24 x 30, sold
oil on paper, 24" x 30"
oil on paper, 30" x 24", commission
oil on paper, 24" x 30"
oil on paper, 30" x 24"
oil on paper, 30" x 24", sold
oil on paper, 30" x 24"
oil on paper, 30" x 24", sold
oil on paper, 30" x 24"
oil on paper, 24" x 30"
oil on paper, 24" x 30"
oil on canvas, commission
oil on canvas, commission
oil on canvas, commission
oil on canvas, commission
oil on canvas, commission
oil on canvas, commission
oil on canvas, commission
oil on canvas, commission
oil on canvas, sold
oil on paper, 24" x 30"
oil on paper, 24" x 30"
oil on paper, 24" x 30"
48 x 48, oil on board, sold
oil on board, 48x48, sold
oil on canvas, 27 x 39
A soul portrait is an exploration into a memory - a place inside you - perhaps authentic or fantasy. This could entail superpowers, costumes, animals, spirits, faraway lands. Through a series of conversations, I will work closely with you, gathering visual clues culminating into the creation of your soul portrait. I will be working from photographs that I will gather from your collection or take as needed. Please feel free to reach out to discuss and dream up your unique portrait.
Prices vary depending on size.
oil on canvas, 16 x 20
oil on canvas, 30 x 24
